Lost and Found

Ok, so, this is the craziest blog entry to date ~ I don't even know how I should state this, or how to say it, I am still digesting (word of the week) what has happened in the last 12 hrs. So I will just go out on this limb...

Last night I found my dad.

Well, in technical terms, his daughter found me. On facebook, she emailed me last night the following:

"Hello, my name is Emma. We've never met, and judging from the distance between us, that possibility isn't all that likely. However, I wanted to introduce myself to you on the off-chance that we do.
My father's name is Phillip King, and, from what I can figure out, he might be your biological father as well. He doesn't know that I'm writing to you, and, though he's curious about you, he's also not very outgoing and probably afraid that you won't want to talk to him..." etc., there was alot more but for the sake of this blog I will cut it short ...

So, when I first got this in my inbox I literally couldn't speak and I started to cry like a little girl (guess I still am) and Jay got all upset cause he couldn't figure out why I was so upset and I couldn't speak to tell him what was going on and it was all very disorganized and emotional and strange.

I was VERY apprehensive about writing her back, because I know, KNOW that this opens a VERY large can of worms.  But I needed to know this was real (because at first I thought it was not) and of course, this is my Dad.  My Dad, whom I have never met, who I know only a very small handful of things about.

So I wrote her back two sentences: "How did you find me" and "Do you have photos" because, even though I only have 4 photos, I believe I could tell if this Phillip King was indeed my dad or not.

She sent me back a website  (this is where the story starts to get miraculously, providentially crazy) of his BAND (yes, he has a band -- a CHRISTIAN Brit-Punk band) according to the site (which is obviously pretty dated, but according to Emma, somewhat accurate to how he looks) they still play as far as I can guess.  I spent the better part of three hours last night looking through all the links on the site, which seems like it's written primarily by him.  As if this wasn't enough, dear readers and friends, about 45 mins into my discovering I came across this page:

http://www.kidzx.com/cadillac/cadillac.htm

I think this is pretty self explanatory. I can't even look at it without crying.

So, the long and the short of this right now is I have emailed Emma back asking where they are (I can't figure out, seems like East Coast somewhere) and I am holding myself together rather poorly at work here today ... if anyone has any experience in this sort of thing, I would greatly appreciate advice.

I don't know what I should do and my emotions are off the charts ranging from breaking down into tears when I think of it, to sheer terror about the thought of meeting him, to fear that this will all blow up and he won't want to see me, to of course, the "fairytale" meeting.

I am trying to focus right now on work for the rest of the day (I prob. shouldn't have even come in, but I don't know what else to do, time does not stop for stuff like this ... though I think it should) and figuring out what is next ...

So, Prayers appreciated!  Next Blog will prob. be pretty quick ;)
love, a.