When I need His Peace ...

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I  have a confession.  And this confession will really either educate you all on my personality and being, or make you think I am right crazy (or a bit of both, lol) but I know that those who read here can be trusted =)

I ran into a particular "issue" of the variety that requires antibiotics this week. No biggie right.  Here is the something that you might not have known about me. I have a complete phobia of taking pills.  It's not the swallowing them deal that scares me, it's the list of side-effects a mile long that come with whatever said drug I am needing to consume.  I don't know what it is but my mind runs rampant with ever ache, pain, tingle, and tinge that is not normal and thinks that I must be having an adverse reaction to whatever I am taking and I get incredibly (unusually) anxious about taking further pills, until about 3 or 4 pills in, till I really do realize that they are NOT infact killing me, and I can relax.

I literally have to psyche myself up to take the pill (which makes it worse, because the more that I think about taking it, the more it scares me to take it and so on, until before I know it, I'm down this dangerous rabbit hole of worry) I can stand there in the kitchen staring at it for 5, 10 sometimes 20 mins (not standing there the whole time) before I can get it down the hatch.

I know, it sounds really stupid, but it's a sad fact for me. And I guess I am sharing right now, because I'm on pill three and one of the side-effects is anxiety, confusion and dizzyness, so it's only compounding my already anxious heart.

Anxious Heart ... 

I know it says in the Bible, do not be anxious for anything, but in everything, with prayer and petition present your requests to God, and the peace of God, that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

I guess I just need my mind to be guarded right now ... that is my prayer, and I just needed to share.  So that I can rest in His Peace. He is near!

Till Next Blog ~ love, a.

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